I'm feeling very uncomfortable.
I'm feeling very uneasy.

To: Myself
Dedicated to: My family members

Why must I be like this? Why can't I live just like other girls want to?
Why must life be so unfair towards me? Why can't I get what I must get? Why must
it have to turn out these way? Do I have good friends? Real good friens,whom will
be there for me always? Please tell me,why must I live like this? Are these all suppose to be tests for me?

This thing have been bothering me since last year. I need one of them to listen to me,to understand me. Is it
that difficult? They just don't get me. They're just doing according to their own needs. Aren't they just being too self-centered? Why must they?

For once,please,can they give me chance to explain. Now,at home,my dad keeps
nagging and nagging about the way I dress when I go for training. Oh please,that's so irritating me. Aren't he sick of nagging all day long? What I do,I wear,I eat or
what so ever,everything,just everything,anything about me,he would find fault in it?
And there,the conflict will start to rise up. Do I deserve all these?

"No,I dont. And I don't want to."

Have they thought about my feelings? Can't they be more supportive,understandable. None of them can do it. NO,NOT EVER!

"I'm just not ready for all those yet. Don't you guys get it? What's
the use of wearing all those when I myself is not fully ready yet?
Doesn't that mean I'm not sincere to carry out all those? What's the use
of keeping up the good name of you guys,making
yourselves happy,while me? I'm just suffering too much. It's not that I don't
like wearing it,just that,I'M NOT READY YET. Please,get that
clear."(though I know none of them would be reading these.)

Aren't you guys forcing me to do so? Which I think
is not good for me as well as for you. Seriously,I want to get this thing settled once and for all. Am I just fated to all these or I'm the one who asked for it?

From: Yourself

MIRA
091095
WORK IT OUT
SB
runway.show@live.com